I played my first church organ gig in 27 years this morning. It wasn’t a disaster, per se, but it was not a glorious return.
I played organ for the wedding of my friends Deb & Mike in 1989, but with that exception, I’ve barely touched any keyboard – organ, piano, or harpsichord – since.
I know I should not expect to be able to play as well as I did nearly three decades ago, but still the results of weeks of hard work is quite disappointing. Back in the day I was playing all the time – a music major at university, a church organist, ballet pianist (the only one) for a regional ballet company, I was playing between 40 and 50 hours a week – and had been for five years.
So – I’m starting to wonder if I should just give up playing and concentrate on composition… I’m not afraid of the hard work that might be involved, but I have no idea, really, of how to go about it. Technical studies I suppose, exercises from here to Nagasaki and back, repeatedly for days / weeks / months on end. I’m discouraged…
But at least the people at the church were very nice – said “you did just fine!” even though I know I didn’t. If I believed in god I’d go to a church like the one I played for this morning.